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Friday, November 27, 2020

Thanksgiving

 

Yard in Portland, Oregon Scott cared for at our House Sit
We didn't get paid, it was a housing exchange for pet care
The owner of the home, was a bit overwhelmed
Scott initiated and completed projects to make her life easier
He bought garden supplies with his own money, never asking for money in return
Fixing her water system and cleaning the gardens of debris, keeping everything nice until she returned
the Siamese house sit kitty oversaw all his efforts from the window in the living room



Yesterday, was Thanksgiving and I am reminded by one of Scott's daughters to be thankful and joyful for our lives ahead of us. And she is so right, her words of wisdom, she is her father's daughter, fill my heart with hope that the coming days will continue to be filled with mystery and light.

My sister invited me to a small Thanksgiving dinner with her husband and my two nieces and their menagerie of animals. It was the first time I left the house since Scott died, and the first social gathering, thankfully small, that I've attended.

When, I first got there, sitting on the couch, watching my sister finish the gravy and her husband carve the turkey, the girls laughing and teasing their father, I felt a touch of loss enter my body through butterflies in my stomach, anxiety tapping at the door, the realization that Scott would no longer be at any family gatherings, at least in the physical sense.

I breathed through, holding my hands in my lap, holding his.

Within minutes, the feelings disappeared and I became part of the festivities, sitting at the table, filling my plate with food, passing the bowls of stuffing, the gravy boat, the peas and corn, the cranberry sauce, and grabbing a biscuit for the side of my plate. The girls relentlessly continued to tease their father. When my brother in law, asked me how long I've been here on the mountain, I replied "almost two and half months".
Surprised at the race of time, my brother in law, answered "Where have I been?"  Not missing a beat my nieces' rang in chorus "On the Couch".  

That started a giggling hysteria which reminded me of my sisters. We used to tease the adults horribly in our family relentlessly too. I don't think I have ever seen my brother in law sit on the couch. He is always working on a project, doing something for the kids, the animals, his family. Which of course made it even that much funnier. 

Laughing was good. After dinner, the animals were let loose and I was covered in puppy kisses and puppy hugs on my lap.  My sister shoveled a week's worth of leftovers in a glass container for me to take home.

I didn't stay too long. A little over an hour. 

Back home. I put my leftovers in the frig. Sitting on Scott's side of the bed, I broke into tears, crying, and letting him know how much I loved him. After, a good long cry, I picked myself up, and called my mom, returned messages from my friends and Scott's family with short replies of love. 

Last night, I slept well under the soft glow of moonlight and stars.

2 comments:

jonkatz said...

beautiful, beautiful

Janet Hamilton said...

Thank you Jon. Thank you for reading my writing.

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