This afternoon, my sister picked me up to get something to eat and take photos. She asked me where I wanted to go. I said "How about the new deli?" We headed over to Railroad Square and picked up sandwiches, chips, waters, two cookies and a loaf of rye bread for my dad. $65. That's Sonoma County for you. I will say the lox were the best I've ever had, the bagel not so much. The small bag of chips were $4 each. My sister said her sandwich was one of the best she's ever ordered from a deli. Next time, we are bringing our own chips and water, skip the cookies and just get the sandwiches. The sandwiches were worth the money.
I'm going back to packing lunches and snacks from home for my back road trips, so I don't run through so much money.
We waited for our order sitting at the picnic tables in the outdoor dining area which was closed to eating due to COVID restrictions. During our wait, I watched as one of the employees politely asked two other customers to not eat out of their bag of chips while their order was being prepared. Okay.... I am fortunate to not be working in the restaurant business right now, any customer service during COVID must be horribly challenging having to wear face masks for hours and the uncomfortable interactions setting boundaries with people.
Luckily, the two customers obliged and put away their potato chips without a fuss.
We took our sandwiches and waters back to the car and had our picnic on the dashboard in the metered public parking lot with a view of the traffic. After we ate, we headed out to Bodega Bay which turned out to be overcrowded without a parking spot in sight, everyone having the same idea to escape to watch the sunset over the sea.
My sister and I carried on a great conversation about relationships, soulmates, our fate in life, and endless spiritual musings while we spotted several hawks up in the trees off to the side of the country roads leading us back home. It was good to get out. I try to get out every day, I make myself get out everyday, even though it's tough right now. It's important for me to move through the emotions and allow memories to surface no matter how painful they may be. I have many moments of feeling a connection with Scott and joy and gratitude for having met him and having our life together even though it was so short.
At home, lots of tears, and missing him.
Tonight, I am going to treat myself to a series, I have found on Netflix that makes me laugh and forget myself. It's called The Kominsky Method. I love Alan Arkin and I can relate to his character who has lost his wife and is surprised to find himself a widow. Alan Arkin and Michael Douglas are a great pair to watch.
Moment by moment I am feeling my way through this.
Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.